how to manage your 7th house
the house of "the other"
the seventh house is on the opposite side of the 1st house the house of "self"
when you have signs or placements in this house this can indicate what you see in others and deny about yourself
the seventh house is ruled by the sign Libra. Libra represents fairness and balance. Libra is ruled by Venus and represents a "judge" constantly weighing both sides of a situation.
a lot of times we like to push our 7th house energy onto others, so that we can judge them.
the truth is that we embody our 7th house energy in a relationship. Others see us as our 7th house when were committed to something.
If we fail to acknowledge our own tendencies in a relationship the 7th house can become a dark corner, and our own shadow figure looms over our life.
it's easy to say "people are mean to me" but it's more difficult to admit that "I am mean to others.”
this is the point of the seventh house-- how you judge + treat others ends up being how they will manifest into your life.
let's discuss the signs and planets in the 7th✨
where your 7th house begins is considered what sign your 7th house is in!
these are the traits you embody when you relate to others and build a commitment
Aries ♈️
sensitive to anger issues and bullying, impatience and jumping into commitment. the "boss" in every situation
aries 7th house are always trying to take on things by themselves but also hate people who do this. it's okay to ask for help and to work together. patience is the big one considering impatience and "wanting to break free" is the reason why they prefer to go at it alone.
Taurus ♉️
taking their time for a relationship to develop and always having options to choose from
taurus 7th house has a stubborn approach to relationships. they expect commitment and loyalty but like to keep secrets from their partner, and possibly side pieces 🤧
when taurus 7th house decide on someone they are capable of bringing the utmost loyalty and enjoy the idea of "obeying" another's wishes. they use the security of a long term commitment to ease their insecurities and their distaste for change.
taurus 7th house hate when others are unforgiving, weighing them down, or non committal but they tend to embody these traits in a relationship. this gives them a sense of control over what they cannot control-- another person.
Gemini ♊️
doesn't know if they want to commit right off the bat. sensitive to flighty personalities, manipulation, and those who say random things or talk more than they should.
gemini 7th house don't really know what it is they are willing to commit to.
gemini 7th house spends most of their life finding what they like, and who to associate with. they depend on others to give their example of how they could possibly live their life. this is why they don't appreciate those who are also lost.
gemini 7th house are creative individuals who can morph into any situation to seem like a great fit. this is their attempt to see if they enjoy their new form 😂 this makes them masters at manipulation. they usually scoff at the sign of others trying to manipulate them.
gemini 7th house can be quite the talker. and have strong opinions about things. which of course will change but that doesn't matter to them in the moment. so they often get frustrated if others come at them with information they do not deem "important" enough to talk about.
Cancer ♋️
would prefer not to discuss their emotional needs. wants to feel needed.
cancer 7th house likes to focus on themselves because they think they are a lot to handle. so they expect to find someone who can help them out with their own needs and cries for help. they usually end up attracting people who would appreciate their help dealing with their emotional needs and want the cancer 7th house to baby them.
this aggravates the cancer 7th house because they feel that the attention needs to be on them. they hold immense caring abilities and are the perfect mothers, capable of nurturing another. however they would like it be on their terms.
cancer 7th house dislikes needy people yet they feel like they are needy people, this cycle continues until they learn how to rely on others emotionally.
Leo ♌️
wants a cheerleader in a relationship. likes to be dependent on the light of others.
leo 7th house wants to be supported in everything they do. it's crucial to them that they are celebrated for their existence and uniqueness.
leo 7th house ends up being the cheerleader for others naturally because they are so full of energy and are just happy to committed to another's presence.
for leo 7th house it's possible that they will take it personally if you are not always sending them positivity. they will notice and will refuse to send any light your way.
a lot of times the leo 7th house will depend solely on the positivity and uplifting energy of the other and fail to realize that they have become sort of a black hole, sucking it all in.
Virgo ♍️
judgemental + critical. hard to please. wants others to be useful.
virgo 7th house wants relationships that can help them complete their to do list each day. they like to mix their agenda with another where they help the other out and the other helps them too.
virgo 7th house hates to be criticized or judged. even though they often try to police others, highlighting where others can improve and making others feel inadequate-- compared to their standards. this only shows how inadequate they feel themselves to be.
virgo 7th house can be very hard to please considering they want others to do things the exact way that they would do them.
Libra ♎️
charming. enabler. internal battle.
libra 7th house wants to keep the peace. at all costs, even the cost of their own peace. this is where things get tricky, because libra 7th house expects others to read their minds, so that they don't have to disrupt the flow of the relationship.
libra 7th house has issues with taking control. this can make them seem complacent and down right indecisive. this is why they dislike others who can't take the lead. they feel uncomfortable if they have no one solid to work with. they need to be able to maneuver around someone else's energy + space. this is what makes them the most comfortable.
Scorpio ♏️
a detective in their relationships. always "one step ahead". quite possessive.
scorpio 7th house focuses on survival when they are committed. how to keep a relationship surviving, or how to keep a person committed to them. they do so in a secretive way, in hopes to stay in control of the others actions and feelings-- without being found out.
scorpio 7th house dislikes when others want privacy from them, yet they prefer to stay private themselves. They like to feel powerful in relationships. to be assured that what they do impacts the other. but they hate feeling like others could use their own power against them.
because of this scorpio 7th house tries to stay ahead of the other, and can become quite a detective or stalker. just to be sure they are not going to be betrayed, and to better know how to stay ahead-- targeting the others weaknesses.
Sagittarius ♐️
the teachers in a relationship. likes to have the freedom to learn on their own.
sagittarius 7th house has the tendency to keep smart people around yet they want to be the smartest one in the room. they have the talent of being able to expand their commitment to the extremes, completely engulfing their soul into the other. but if their partner tries to do this to them, there's a problem.
sagittarius 7th house needs the freedom + privacy of finding themselves. finding the answers to life. so that they can come back and share everything they learned with their partner. they will even research things solely to help in their partner's life. sagittarius 7th house doesn't like when people try to teach them something because they feel like they are the teachers-- that they should be the wisest.
they may seem relaxed and care-free but sagittarius 7th house push everyday to become more and more experienced and more and more committed to their endeavors. but they wanna feel like they have the other figured out already. so there is a tendency to want to jump to conclusions.
Capricorn ♑️
long term + successful relationships fulfill them. wants to rely on someone to "rescue" them from their lives.
capricorn 7th house prefers to let their partner go to work while they stay home, but they always end up being a really hard worker nonetheless. a lot of times they like to let their partner think they want to be swept off their feet and handled. but they are too much of a boss to even let that happen.
capricorn 7th house just get lazy and prefer to take the shortcut of letting someone else fix their problems. but when they see laziness in others they are disgusted. the reality of this is that capricorn 7th house attract those who need them to be responsible and on top of their game, because capricorn 7th house are the ones who will rescue their partner again and again-- and be more than happy to do so.
Aquarius ♒️
a strange relationship with all that is bohemian. likes to stay distant with others.
aquarius 7th house doesn't appreciate when others are impersonal with them. they hate when others put the aquarius 7th house in a position of comparison.
aquarius 7th house are the best. so they must be treated as the best. however they have the tendency to stand at a distance holding a 6 foot stick between themselves and another— they like their space. if it was the other person holding the stick to them they would just walk away because they wouldn't feel appreciated for their presence.
aquarius 7th house likes to disassociate from others and will judge those who treat them like they do someone else. they like to be different and held on a pedestal, but it's hard for them to appreciate another's differences. when they do, it's no doubt that they both will stand away from the crowd, together.
Pisces ♓️
committed unconditionally no matter what. a bit of an escapist.
pisces 7th house lacks boundaries. they like to merge themselves and another into one being. call it balance but it ends up being far from balanced. their imagination takes them into a fantasy of what they think the relationship is growing into. when in reality they are not being realistic with the relationship. they lose themselves in another too easily.
pisces 7th house wants to be considered the down to earth person who is helpful and tactful. when they commit to another person who they deem is out of touch with reality, or seeming sad and helpless, the whole time the pisces 7th house are actually the ones floating in the air 🤧 they are more careless than they believe themselves to be.
pisces 7th house wants someone to escape reality with. someone who can get them to relax. they are a bundle of nerves just walking around. however, they end up being the ones who help the other escape into their own world, because it's just straight dreams and gimmicks, nothing too serious going on. once they accept their tendency for escapism they will fully integrate into their magical relationships.
planets in the 7th house
mercury
easier to understand your life when you discuss it with others.
sometimes you just need that extra voice in your head to help you make sense of things. this could also indicate someone who requires another person to listen to their thoughts out loud-- someone to become their diary. only then will your head be cleared and less scatter brained. this also applies when you have mercury in 7th, you are wonderful at listening and being there as a piece of paper for someone to rely on to write out all their thoughts. depending on which sign mercury is in will indicate how you are communicating these ideas.
moon
emotional processing occurs with others around.
by yourself it may be difficult to really acknowledge and process how you feel, and when someone is there to mirror you you are able to feel their emotions-- reminding you to feel your own too. a lot of times it's comforting to see others feel things before you realize it's okay to feel and to act on your feelings according to what they require you to do. there's a lot of second guessing yourself but with another there to help you validate them and reassure you it becomes easier to be yourself unapologetically. moon in 7th house connects their inner child to the others inner child-- just two kids talking about their feelings and inner thoughts. potentially a very safe space with another is created.
sun
fears are triggered in relationships.
there's a strong urge to protect yourself when faced with another other person. your ego is heightened and life becomes a very serious matter-- your sense of being is almost blinding you. it's important to commit to someone who is strong willed as well, and serious about their goals. there's a possibility you can outshine others naturally in a relationship-- what sign your sun is in determines how.
venus
long term commitment is something you learn to value through another.
a guiding voice of reason to others, adding sugar to a relationship. depending on what your venus sign is you learn how to value that aspect of life with the other. they help you navigate decision making and judging what you should do or invest your time in. you go to them for advice and guidance! decision making is not your strongest suite here, so don't hesitate to ask for help weighing your options. you also have the gift of helping the other make decisions but you often come off as judgemental. you will always try to approach the matter with charm and persuasiveness, and with a level head. with another you can shape each others taste and what to indulge in, as well as what you deem as important to take care of and enjoy.
mars
relationships help you stay motivated.
it's quite possible that those with mars in the 7th have issues with motivation, and would prefer to have another involved in their life to help them stay motivated to complete tasks and to accomplish goals. it's easier to fight for "us" than to fight for just yourself. people motivate you, and that's alright! your gift is being the fire that lights under the other's heart--you warm them up with your passion and commitment to them. they do the same to you. mars in the 7th is sometimes associated with anger issues in a partner as well, depending on what sign mars is in for you will determine how your actions are expressed towards the other. beware of letting your passion get too explosive-- learn to be patient so that the other can be patient with you.
jupiter
there's really nothing you won't do with or for other people.
you are like a slinky, the way that you will bend backwards and forwards and backwards again-- no problem! you expect others to do the same. what matters the most to you is keeping a commitment going, because commitments are serious business to you, and the limits that which you will reach with another are astounding. your relationships are a driving force in your life, you let them call the shots. the best case scenario would be learning something from other people, because a lot of the time you are the one teaching them! being around those who can share wisdom and beliefs with you will thrive in your presence. try not to impose your way of life on the other! because you would hate for someone to do that to you. let the relationship create expansion for your mind-- not limitations. go traveling with people, and make friends or business relations in foreign places!
saturn
your success with other people is hindered.
there's a tendency to live an unbalanced, therefore unhealthy life with saturn in the 7th. relationships may not last long in the beginning, because you are unsure of how much to give of yourself and how much to receive back. you are being asked to wait for a long term relationship until you're ready. there's lessons to learn early on that will help you dodge a few bullets for your future relationships that will end up lasting. there's a possibility you were unable to dodge a few bullets already in relationships, and they left you or the other feeling depleted. it's important that you learn how to become reliable and calm yourself, before you bring these problems into someone else's life. keeping a relationship stable may be an insecurity for a while, it's your job to figure out why. i'm telling you it will be worth the wait! depending on what sign your saturn is in will determine what type of obstacles you have to learn how to maneuver in relationships. check my blog post on the signs in astrology. it's common for saturn in the 7th to reference their parent's habits that created unbalanced scenarios in their relationships. the faster you can learn your saturnian lessons and be able to balance yourself, the faster you can commit to someone truthfully. saturn reminds us that time is limited, and you only get one shot at life. so saturn says "do it right the first time!"
uranus
unstable relationships that are constantly changing direction and are jam packed with surprises!
sudden insights for each others lives are experienced. change is influenced in your life because of your commitment to another person, and you will also promote change in their life. other people come into your life suddenly and might leave suddenly too. either that or they will come into your life and your life will completely transform, and vice versa. not just physically but also mentally or emotionally. other people bring what seems like random chaos into your life, and so you end up doing the same to others. it's an uncomfortable position for uranus to be in because your relationship to others is extreme, with highs and lows that swiftly change. one day you're close as ever and another day it's the cold shoulder. you feel these extremes sensitively, and depending on what sign uranus is in will determine what kind of things trigger sudden changes in direction for your relationships and how that effects your life. uranus represents breaking conventional structure and changing routines, so the constant reshaping of your relationships are common. unconventional, maybe poly, relationships are common with this placement. a couple who will do the craziest things together, and stand out from the rest of society.
neptune
you have the perfect relationship envisioned.
you are wise enough to know exactly the type of relationship you want, you are encouraged to follow your dreams of what you want in all of your relationships, and what they look like! you can manifest your fairytale into reality, and play out your relationships like a movie. other people may bring their own visions to the table and it's up to you to decide if the visions match up to yours or not. there can be a lot of projection coming from the other because of their own dreams for a relationship and who they wish you could be, it's your job to dodge any evil sent your way to protect your fairytale dream and also to stay on track!!! it's easy to lose sight of your own dream when you are presented with other people and their dreams. pay attention to their projections! don't believe everything they say about you, it could be false. the same goes with you, be careful not to project your idea of a person onto them, be realistic if they match your dream partner or not. don't try to make the puzzle piece fit, work smarter not harder. it's important that you don't give up on your fairytale. you will get it right.
pluto
a driving force for change in others. others inspire you to reevaluate your worth, and empower you to be a better person.
it's possible that people come into your life to destroy you, simply so that you transform as a person after theyre gone. it's an enlightening path that you are on, considering that you are so powerful when committed to someone. what you say impacts them intensely, and vice versa. it's the little things that impact you, slowly building up to a tower moment. there could be power struggles in relationships, you want to feel special and this is what makes you feel safe. your ego is heightened to protect you, trying to make your "power move" to show them who's boss. if your safety with someone is threatened, you will build resentment and seek to destroy the relationship. learn how to let go when it's time.